Attendees: Bob, Alice, Charlie, and 27 other highly trained professionals.
Objective: To create a system to detect and respond to fake sicknesses, such as "I'm not a morning person" or "I'm allergic to mornings."
Fake Sickness Registry
Keep track of all reported fake sicknesses, including but not limited to:
- "My cat's on fire"
- "The sky is falling"
- "I'm allergic to productivity"
Protocol Proposal
Present your case for why your fake sickness should be recognized and accommodated.
Include but not limited to:
- A detailed explanation of the science behind your condition
- A list of symptoms, including but not limited to: excessive coffee consumption, procrastination, or excessive Netflix watching
- A plan for how you will contribute to the team in your condition
Decision-Making Process
Our expert panel will review all submitted fake sicknesses and make a decision.
Includes but not limited to:
- A detailed explanation of the criteria used to evaluate the legitimacy of each fake sickness
- A list of possible outcomes, including but not limited to: approval, denial, or temporary desk chair relocation
Meeting adjourned until next week when we will discuss the meeting minutes.